Below is an email I received from a reader.
I have decided to share with you all incase it benefits
Dear Relationship Doctor
My boyfriend and I broke up a month ago. He says he no longer loves me. I miss him like crazy - how do I make him love me again?
Jessica
Dear Jessica
Short answer is that you can't. Long answer is you can however make the next few months easier for yourself. And then if you follow my forthcoming Do's and Don't's - the outcome will be either you are back to together or by the time you realise you are not ever getting back together, you won't care.
DON'T
Call him or text him and ask him why more than once? You deserve closure but watch out for the restraining order
Call his family and or friends and ask why
Drive past his house even if in someone else's car
Stalk his facebook
Get your friends to stalk his facebook
Cry to all your friends for any longer than two weeks - one month if the relationship was really long. They may sound sympathetic but secretly they are thinking you need to get over it. You do not need the extra negative energy
Wear his t-shirt to bed. Seriously girlfriend - you don't be dumped as well as start to smell bad
DO
Gather up all his things and things he gave you and store them in a box out of sight. You will know when its the right to look at them and by then you will either want to ditch them or you look at them once or twice fondly. And possibly also think "what was I thinking!!"
Delete him from your phone - nothing more tragic than a 2am angry/tragic/sad texts or a voicemail that just plays Kasey Chambers "Am I Not Pretty Enough!"
Delete him from your facebook - its torture plus. Forget being the bigger person. Delete.
Keep his friends as your facebook friends so they can tell him when you have a new boyfriend or updated a new fabulous profile picture.
Make a mantra playlist on your ipod. A collection of songs that make you will great and strong that you can pump really loud whenever you need. (Songs on my list include; You Oughta Know – Alanis Morrissette, She F***ing Hates – Me Puddle of Mud, Good Riddance – Green Day, I Will Survive – Cake, Used To Love Her – Guns n’Roses (personal fav!!), You Give Love A Bad Name – Bon Jovi
Buy yourself a new outfit, a pedicure, a manicure and a facial. If you are going to be dumped anyway, you might as well look fabulous!
Stay away from all the places you used to frequent as a couple
Self-reflect but don't obsess
Start dating again - resist the urge to go all Anne Frank. Unless you die tomorrow, someone else will hurt you, its life. Might as well have some more fun along the way.
Hope this helps.
Relationship Doctor
