You have heard of chemistry between people or the chemistry of a sports team. Well, attraction and attachment, as much as we hate to admit it, doesn't come from the heart. It comes from subconscious feelings. Love is about how the other person makes you feel... That isn't magic, and there isn't just that "one person out there for you". The fact of the matter is that love involves nonverbal reactions--synaptic (chemical) connections within our brains--despite how unromantic that sounds.
Every love passes through these stages..Lust is a passive phenomenon and is just a craving……Attraction on the otherhand is a blinding sensation…When attraction, or romantic passion, comes into play, we often lose our ability to think rationally -- at least when it comes to the object of our attraction. The old saying "love is blind" is really accurate in this stage. We are often oblivious to any flaws our partner might have. We idealize them and can't get them off our minds. This overwhelming preoccupation and drive is part of our biology.
LOVE consists of three stages---
1.Lust
2.Attraction
3.attachment
The attachment, or commitment, stage is love for the duration. You've passed fantasy love and are entering into real love. This stage of love has to be strong enough to withstand many problems and distractions
•MRI scans have shown that love lights up parts of the brain linked to the reward system that can cause drug addiction
•Early stage romantic love activates different parts of the brain to sex drive and attachment
•Falling in love appears to reduce serotonin levels in the blood in a similar way to obsessive-compulsive disorders
So what happens in the brain?
Love occurs due to the mediation of certain molecules which also act in drug addiction,compulsive disorders and other mental problems…
Dopamine- is thought to be the "pleasure chemical," producing a feeling of bliss.high levels of dopamine are also associated with norepinephrine, which heightens attention, short-term memory, hyperactivity, sleeplessness and goal-oriented behavior. In other words, couples in this stage of love focus intently on the relationship and often on little else.
Norepinephrine is similar to adrenaline and produces the racing heart and excitement.
The human body releases the cocktail of love rapture only when certain conditions are met and ... men more readily produce it than women, because of their more visual nature.
Another possible explanation for the intense focus and idealizing view that occurs in the attraction stage comes from researchers at University College London. They discovered that people in love have lower levels of serotonin and also that neural circuits associated with the way we assess others are suppressed.
When The Honeymoon's Over
Some scientists believe that after a certain period, from 18 months to 4 years, one's body gets used to these love stimulants. After building up a tolerance to the love chemicals, passionate romances can cool .In this phase of the relationship, your brain produces endorphins, brain opiates more like morphine than the attraction chemicals.These morphins and endorphins can cause attachment or if conditions are unfavourable the love is cooled off….this is the crucial period during which marriages can stay or break…that is why divorces peak at 4years after marriage…
Understand it better? I'd love to hear your love stories - email me at @
therelationshipdoctor.com@gmail.com
